wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
