Dual....:-)
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
She announced her abortion via fbk
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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