you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
