he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
