She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
