dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
