Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
