last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
