She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize