its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
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