There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
