lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
