Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
