i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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