Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
