dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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