Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
