i think my mom watched the whole time
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
