yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
the room spins SO much faster in panama
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
