Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
