Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I am in a vortex of obligation.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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