do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
