I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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