We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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