Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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