I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
