Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
