Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
