I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
