Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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