brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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