i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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