I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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