we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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