Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
