I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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