dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
North Korea, Best Korea!
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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