best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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