trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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