Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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