i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize