Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Randomize