Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
