I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
When did angry sex become our thing?
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize