maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
