So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize