You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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