Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
