apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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