It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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